Taking a real decision
A week has passed since I started the 100 Day Challenge to more joy, more income and creative success.
It’s been nothing like I expected.
On the day after deciding to do this, I got sick. For the first time in 23 years.
1995 I was sitting at the pier in Lüderitz, waiting to be picked up by a helicopter that was to fly me to a diamond ship run by De Beers. I had the flu, and instead of excitement about the adventure ahead I just wanted to go back to bed. This annoyed me so much that I decided there and then to never get the flu again.
And it worked, until last week….
While this might seem coincidental to some, to me it’s certainly not. I think I got the flu now to remind me of the attitude required to create real change.
True change needs a very clear decision. A no-matter-what attitude.
No back doors, no maybe’s. Like Captain Hernán Cortés. In 1519 he and his men landed in Veracruz to begin their conquest. Once they had arrived, he ordered to destroy their ships.
Which meant that if they didn't win they would die. Retreat was no longer possible.
My decision to do the 100 Day Challenge had nothing of that fervour.
On the surface, this also seems unnecessary. But I do know that some of the beliefs I carry need exactly this clear cut dedication if I ever want to change them.
And something is stopping me from going there. It feels like it would mean to surrender my identity...
I kept writing a lot more after this that I haven't included in this post. It's rambling and personal, and it took a while to get out. Which is also why the review comes a day later than planned. But it did help me to unravel a whole lot of old beliefs.
As a result of doing this, I can say now say with clarity and certainty that by May 10th, I will have reached the goals I set for myself.
It feels like i arrived at the crossroads and I finally chose freedom!
I will keep you posted on what happens from here onwards.
I know that it will be fast, and it will be interesting. Once a true decision has been made, the Universe moves with speed :).
I can't wait!
Lots of love
